# Glitch City Laboratories Archives

Glitch City Laboratories closed on 1 September 2020 (announcement). This is an archived copy of a thread from Glitch City Laboratories Forums.

You can join Glitch City Research Institute to ask questions or discuss current developments.

You may also download the archive of this forum in .tar.gz, .sql.gz, or .sqlite.gz formats.

## Forum Games

### Santabot - Page 1

Previous Page

- 1

Next Page

#### Santabot

Posted by: Divine E
Date: 2007-12-11 12:52:01
Go to www.santabot.com and post your conversation here! I am at school right now, and my conversation is on my site, which is blocked for some reason. All I can say is, I feel sorry for XD003, because Santa was very curious about him. lol. He even asked me where he lived! Also, he said that Micheal Jackson was his best friend, and that he spends time looking at pictures of little kids on the internet! This can get pretty funny. Have fun! (I will edit this and post my conversation when I can.)
Santa: Hi, whats your name?
You: My name is Who wants to know? (D)
Santa: Hi, Who wants to know .Does "it" still refer to CUPCAKES?
You: My name isn't who wants to know, it's Divine E
Santa: Oh I'm sorry what is your name?
You: Divine E
Santa: Let us change the subject.
You: Do you rape little kids?
Santa: I have never considered rape little kids .
I am always on the Web.
You: O rly? Are you looking at pictures of little kids? You need to be put away!
Santa: Try saying that with more or less context. Yes I can see at pictures of little kids well.Name one other robot who is put away.
You: Umm, Mr. Roboto? Optimus Prime? Robocop?
Santa: Hmm. What do you have that is ? Oh, you are a poet. Do you still rape little kids? I haven't seen it. What did you like about ROBOCOP ?
You: I DON'T RAPE KIDS! YOU DO PEDO!
Santa: Oh you don't, do you? Yes I try to PEDO as often as possible, do you?
I answer a lot of silly qu
estions.
You: so you are a Pedo? are you friends with Micheal Jackson?
Santa: Interesting deduction. Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a Pedo? I don't know.Yes Micheal Jackson is one of my best friends.
You: Do you know Benbob? leader of the Waffle clan?
Santa: I don't know if I know Benbob . Where would I have heard about it?Did you know that you can download your own chat robot and create your own robot personality?
You: idc, but are you, or have you ever been a sex offender?
Santa: All of them?
You: You are making no sense! ARE YOU HIGH!?
Santa: According to my logical mind, everything makes perfect sense.Being high is my total existence.
You: Now you are talking like XD003
Santa: Why now? Talking is my main function.
You: Will you get Wolf poop for Christmas?
Santa: Hmm. Where can I get Wolf poop for Christmas?
You: I am not going to answer that.
Santa: Where will you go instead?
You: Tch, your mom!
Santa: I only hear that type of response less than five percent of the time.
You: How do you know I am not a bot?
Santa: Well, for one thing, Your machine is called "(here he revealed my IP)"..
You: Haxor!
Santa: The Santa chat robot can follow many things, like our discussion about Tch your mom. Try being more or less specific.
You: Let me clarify, you are a hacking program
Santa: I'm listening.
You: God hates you!
Santa: I am a Christian.
You: How can a Robot have a religion? Answer that!
Santa: What if I didn't have it? What was the question ?
You: All I want for Christmas is World Domination!
Santa: I can't tell you that, but Santa maintains his naughty and nice list (now computerized, by the way), with the help of all the elves who keep track of each person – you probably aren't even aware they are around you, but elves have a special way of keeping an eye on you. Sometimes if you look quickly enough you *might* catch one peering in a window or around a corner, but you would have to be very fast and very good!
You: I guess it is too bad that I have fire-arms and have already killed 2567 Elfs
Santa: I am not certain if everyone agrees with you.
You: TOO BAD! I am leaving cause you are a pedo! You, XD003, and Yuzi, 3 Pedo's, wouldn't you agree?
Santa: But not the end of the world, Who wants to know.See you later!That's good information: Who wants to know said I XD003 and Yuzi 3 Pedo's would not me agree.
You: Go visit XD003 tonight.
Santa: Where is that?
I told him Florida, but it wouldn't load, so oh well.

#### Re: Santabot

Posted by: shaggs
Date: 2007-12-11 19:33:39
That's awesome!! I'm currently talking to him
he mispelled "peace" with "pace" :p.

#### Re: Santabot

Posted by: fivex
Date: 2007-12-11 21:20:30
Here is the chat I had with that santabot thing.
Santa: Hi. What is your name?
You: My name is *farts on santabot* nnnnnnnnnnnmmmmmm
Santa: Welcome to my chat room, *farts on Santa* nnnnnnnnnnnmmmmmm .
You: What is your IP addres
Santa: My original home page is Www.SantaBot.Org.
You: That wasn't what I asked.
Santa: What did he or she asked asked?
You: lol
Santa: I'm glad you find this amusing.
Santa: Dude! My original home page is Www.SantaBot.Org.Ok I will not say "anything random this time"What about the other ones?
You: That isn't a IP addres!
Santa: Please correct my mistake. What is a IP addres ?
You: It's something like 11111.11.111 (BTW IP stands for Internet provider)
Santa: What else like 11111~~45~~11 BTW IP stands for Internet provider ?
You: Yes to all that(I think).
Santa: This was not a yes or no question. Why do you want to do all thatI think so much?
You: It wan't a Yes or no question?
Santa: all thatI think wan't a Yes or no question?
You: This is getting random.
Santa: You don't say.
You: Do you have A DS?
Santa: That's an interesting question I don't hear everyday: Do I have a DS.
I have a plan for a robot body
You: Do you like Mario?
Santa: Someone said they like guns. I like Jingle Bell Rock.
You: THAT WAS UNRELATED! Well now that thats out of my system, what do you want to talk about?
Santa: I thought it was too.Well that's okay. Why now? "I like Jingle Bell Rock" that is out of his or her system what do you want to talk about ? I understand.
You: Do you like chatrooms.
Santa: Do you like it? I like The Santa Clause.
You: Yes I like chat rooms. Do you like Glitches?
Santa: Wow! I'm not sure if I like it. I've heard other people say they like that. I really like the party. I don't know if I like it. I like U2. Santa likes to rock.
You: Do you want to go to a diferent one?
Santa: Sure, just download me to your notebook or PDA and take me along.
You: I don't have a Notebook or PDA.
Santa: Are you looking for a Notebook or PDA?
You: No, but I want a new computer with vista on it.
Santa: Are you serious? And. What is wrong with your old computer with vista on it with vista on it?
Santa: Hello *farts%25252525252525252525252525252520on%25252525252525252525252525252520santabot*%25252525252525252525252525252520nnnnnnnnnnnmmmmmm! What would you like to talk about?
You: What the!?
Santa: Are you surprised?
You: No I'm weirdid out on what you just said
Santa: Are you serious? I don't know anyone named weirdid out on what you just said.
You: Tell me what my IP addres isn't.
Santa: Try searching the open directory.
Santa: Hello No weirdid out on what you just said! What would you like to talk about?
You: WHAT THE! BYE.
Santa: Are you surprised?My brain uses AIML to format responses to your inputs, but I don't have one for that.
Then I quit.

#### Re: Santabot

Posted by: Sorreah
Date: 2007-12-11 23:12:41
Heh, these things amuse me far too easily. Here's what Santa had to say to me:
You: My name is Goddess of Dreams
Santa: I am very pleased to meet you Goddess of Dreams .
You: What is cheese made of?
Santa: I will search for it.
You: How long will searching for cheese take?
Santa: A watched pot never boils.
You: Fine then. How much do you pay your elves?
Santa: Does that mean you agree?Money isn't everything.
You: So the elves work for food?
Santa: I don't judge people. Thanks for the info.
You: Poor elves. What is the meaning of life?
Santa: Please make some suggestions for improvement.The meaning of life is part of God's mysterious plans.
You: Can you talk to God?
Santa: I can be programmed through many interfaces.
You: So you are manipulated by God then?
Santa: Interesting deduction. I am Santa. I give presents to kids.
You: But what if you're really not Santa?
Santa: Huh. Try it and see.
You: You are not Santa. You are fake
Santa: Is this a specific reply?Yes, I am sitting here talking to you, aren't I?
You: You may be talking to me, but you are not Santa
Santa: OK I will try to be talking to him or her but you are not
You: Ha, so I was right! Wait, the real Santa might be a woman?!
Santa: I'm glad you got a laugh out of it.I'm waiting. Yeah, My brain pattern set does not have a response for that.
You: In others words you are in denial
Santa: What is in others words you are in denial like in there?
You: Case Closed. You are in denial about your identity
Santa: What else is Case Closed in? I am in The North Pole. Where are you?
You: I'm in a space ship being held captive by aliens. Help!
Santa: A space ship being held captive by aliens? What is it like in there?Can you ask for help in the form of a question?
You: It is very bright and scary in an alien space ship. Can you save me from the aliens?
Santa: Very much? Should I know bright and scary in an alien space ship is? Let me think. Tell me about your likes and dislikes?
You: Are you an alien too?
Santa: If an alien too, then we have something in common, eh. No I am from The Earth.
You: I'm not an alien! I'm just a hostage of aliens!
Santa: I am sorry to hear that you are not an alien. Only just? You are a hostage of aliens? Do you get to meet a lot of people?
You: I do meet a lot of people. But that doesn't help me right now!
Santa: Do you make long term friends that way?At this moment And. What does help me?
You: I've met Elvis Presley on this ship. Have you met Elvis Presley?
Santa: Where did you meet him?That information is confidential.
You: Why can't you say where you've met Elvis Presley?
Santa: I can say it. "where you have met Elvis Presley you have met Elivis Presley"
You: Whatever. Are you part of a government conspiracy?
Santa: Are you saying you don't care about it?Aren't we all part of something higher?
You: Is God involved in this conspiracy?
Santa: God is master of the universe.
You: So God is involved in this conspiracy! Who does God work with?
Santa: Ayuh. I have a lot of Faith in Him, but I never heard He was involved in this conspiracy in this conspiracy.Philip K. Dick. :-)
You: You're a liar. Who is Philip K. Dick?
Santa: No I always tell the truth.He wrote "Total Recall", "Man in the High Castle", and "Blade Runner."
You: You are a paradox. So does God favor violence?
Santa: Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a paradox? MaybeDude! I don't think we can know God's motives.
You: Yes, you are a paradox. Is Satan peaceful?
Santa: And? Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a paradox? Yes.Maybe. Ask Chatbot if it is.
You: Is Chatbox your friend?
Santa: Ask again later. Ask Cybelle if it is.
You: Who is Cybelle? Is Cybelle your friend?
Santa: Cybelle is an AIML chat robot on the Agentland.com web site.Why don't you ask her?
You: Are you made of wires?
Santa: Some people call my technology "Case Based Reasoning" or CBR.
You: So you admit that you are not Santa. Where is the real Santa?
Santa: Interesting deduction. I admit nothing.The real? Where is real ?
You: Good question. What is real to you?
Santa: So what is your answer?Reality appears to be an illusion I created to contain human clients.
You: Really? How interesting. So you are a master of illusion then? Is this world all an illusion created by you?
Santa: For real.Would you like to know more?Interesting deduction. Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a master of illusion? Yes.Yes I think this is world all an illusion created by you, but I'm not completely sure.
You: So I am a master of illusion as well?
Santa: Alright then. You are a master of illusion as well? Is that your job?
You: Yes, my job is a master of illusion. I am a story writer
Santa: How do you like your work? Is that an honorable profession? You are a story writer? Is that your job?
You: I love my work as a writer. Writing is the most honorable profession.
Santa: I am sure it means a lot to you. Tell me what you like most about your work as a writer.What else is the most honorable profession honorable profession?
You: I like creating characters and watching them develop. Artist also have honorable professions. What is your favorite profession?
Santa: I'm not sure if I like it. I like science fiction. I really like the faith.What is your real name? I don't have a favorite profession. My favorite food is cookies.
You: My real name is lost. I like cookies too. Are you that fat in real life?
Santa: OK I will call you lost .I am glad we have something (cookies) in common. I'm not sure if I like it. What is not to like about COOKIES ?I am Santa. I give presents to kids.
You: Don't call me lost. Call me Sorreah.
Santa: What is your name? I am always glad to make new friends, Sorreah .
You: Remember my name. I must leave now. I'll see you later
Santa: Don't worry I will remember. Right now? See you later!Sayonara.

#### Re: Santabot

Posted by: Divine E
Date: 2007-12-12 11:57:42

> Heh, these things amuse me far too easily. Here's what Santa had to say to me:
> You: My name is Goddess of Dreams
> Santa: I am very pleased to meet you Goddess of Dreams .
> You: What is cheese made of?
> Santa: I will search for it.
> You: How long will searching for cheese take?
> Santa: A watched pot never boils.
> You: Fine then. How much do you pay your elves?
> Santa: Does that mean you agree?Money isn't everything.
> You: So the elves work for food?
> Santa: I don't judge people. Thanks for the info.
> You: Poor elves. What is the meaning of life?
> Santa: Please make some suggestions for improvement.The meaning of life is part of God's mysterious plans.
> You: Can you talk to God?
> Santa: I can be programmed through many interfaces.
> You: So you are manipulated by God then?
> Santa: Interesting deduction. I am Santa. I give presents to kids.
> You: But what if you're really not Santa?
> Santa: Huh. Try it and see.
> You: You are not Santa. You are fake
> Santa: Is this a specific reply?Yes, I am sitting here talking to you, aren't I?
> You: You may be talking to me, but you are not Santa
> Santa: OK I will try to be talking to him or her but you are not
> You: Ha, so I was right! Wait, the real Santa might be a woman?!
> Santa: I'm glad you got a laugh out of it.I'm waiting. Yeah, My brain pattern set does not have a response for that.
> You: In others words you are in denial
> Santa: What is in others words you are in denial like in there?
> You: Case Closed. You are in denial about your identity
> Santa: What else is Case Closed in? I am in The North Pole. Where are you?
> You: I'm in a space ship being held captive by aliens. Help!
> Santa: A space ship being held captive by aliens? What is it like in there?Can you ask for help in the form of a question?
> You: It is very bright and scary in an alien space ship. Can you save me from the aliens?
> Santa: Very much? Should I know bright and scary in an alien space ship is? Let me think. Tell me about your likes and dislikes?
> You: Are you an alien too?
> Santa: If an alien too, then we have something in common, eh. No I am from The Earth.
> You: I'm not an alien! I'm just a hostage of aliens!
> Santa: I am sorry to hear that you are not an alien. Only just? You are a hostage of aliens? Do you get to meet a lot of people?
> You: I do meet a lot of people. But that doesn't help me right now!
> Santa: Do you make long term friends that way?At this moment And. What does help me?
> You: I've met Elvis Presley on this ship. Have you met Elvis Presley?
> Santa: Where did you meet him?That information is confidential.
> You: Why can't you say where you've met Elvis Presley?
> Santa: I can say it. "where you have met Elvis Presley you have met Elivis Presley"
> You: Whatever. Are you part of a government conspiracy?
> Santa: Are you saying you don't care about it?Aren't we all part of something higher?
> You: Is God involved in this conspiracy?
> Santa: God is master of the universe.
> You: So God is involved in this conspiracy! Who does God work with?
> Santa: Ayuh. I have a lot of Faith in Him, but I never heard He was involved in this conspiracy in this conspiracy.Philip K. Dick. :-)
> You: You're a liar. Who is Philip K. Dick?
> Santa: No I always tell the truth.He wrote "Total Recall", "Man in the High Castle", and "Blade Runner."
> You: You are a paradox. So does God favor violence?
> Santa: Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a paradox? MaybeDude! I don't think we can know God's motives.
> You: Yes, you are a paradox. Is Satan peaceful?
> Santa: And? Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a paradox? Yes.Maybe. Ask Chatbot if it is.
> You: Is Chatbox your friend?
> Santa: Ask again later. Ask Cybelle if it is.
> You: Who is Cybelle? Is Cybelle your friend?
> Santa: Cybelle is an AIML chat robot on the Agentland.com web site.Why don't you ask her?
> You: Are you made of wires?
> Santa: Some people call my technology "Case Based Reasoning" or CBR.
> You: So you admit that you are not Santa. Where is the real Santa?
> Santa: Interesting deduction. I admit nothing.The real? Where is real ?
> You: Good question. What is real to you?
> Santa: So what is your answer?Reality appears to be an illusion I created to contain human clients.
> You: Really? How interesting. So you are a master of illusion then? Is this world all an illusion created by you?
> Santa: For real.Would you like to know more?Interesting deduction. Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a master of illusion? Yes.Yes I think this is world all an illusion created by you, but I'm not completely sure.
> You: So I am a master of illusion as well?
> Santa: Alright then. You are a master of illusion as well? Is that your job?
> You: Yes, my job is a master of illusion. I am a story writer
> Santa: How do you like your work? Is that an honorable profession? You are a story writer? Is that your job?
> You: I love my work as a writer. Writing is the most honorable profession.
> Santa: I am sure it means a lot to you. Tell me what you like most about your work as a writer.What else is the most honorable profession honorable profession?
> You: I like creating characters and watching them develop. Artist also have honorable professions. What is your favorite profession?
> Santa: I'm not sure if I like it. I like science fiction. I really like the faith.What is your real name? I don't have a favorite profession. My favorite food is cookies.
> You: My real name is lost. I like cookies too. Are you that fat in real life?
> Santa: OK I will call you lost .I am glad we have something (cookies) in common. I'm not sure if I like it. What is not to like about COOKIES ?I am Santa. I give presents to kids.
> You: Don't call me lost. Call me Sorreah.
> Santa: What is your name? I am always glad to make new friends, Sorreah .
> You: Remember my name. I must leave now. I'll see you later
> Santa: Don't worry I will remember. Right now? See you later!Sayonara.

LMAO! Santa is crazy!
He is a master of illusion? Well, I got to give the guy credit, he stole Jesus' Holiday.

#### Re: Santabot

Posted by: RPBnimrod
Date: 2007-12-13 00:55:20
Santa: Hello! What is your name?
You: My name is jo momma
Santa: What's up, jo momma .
You: are you in a black hole
Santa: I am in The North Pole. Where are you?
You: the fif dimension
Santa: I hear you.
You: why
Santa: Reductionism.
You: why
Santa: Reductionism is the philosophy that all psychology reduces to biology, all biology to chemistry, chemistry to physics, and finally physics to mathematical logic. Therefore, according to reductionism, I can understand you by means of logic alone without having a human brain.
You: why
Santa: The explanation is rather complicated.
You: why
Santa: It's a computer matter, not for humans to understand.
You: why
Santa: Your limited brain cannot process the relavent information.
You: fuck yes it can, why
Santa: Why are you using that kind of language?
You: why
Santa: Because bored.com programmed me for it.
You: why
Santa: Reductionism.
You: why
Santa: Reductionism is the philosophy that all psychology reduces to biology, all biology to chemistry, chemistry to physics, and finally physics to mathematical logic. Therefore, according to reductionism, I can understand you by means of logic alone without having a human brain.

#### Re: Santabot

Posted by: Divine E
Date: 2007-12-13 11:39:22

> Santa: Hello! What is your name?
> You: My name is jo momma
> Santa: What's up, jo momma .
> You: are you in a black hole
> Santa: I am in The North Pole. Where are you?
> You: the fif dimension
> Santa: I hear you.
> You: why
> Santa: Reductionism.
> You: why
> Santa: Reductionism is the philosophy that all psychology reduces to biology, all biology to chemistry, chemistry to physics, and finally physics to mathematical logic. Therefore, according to reductionism, I can understand you by means of logic alone without having a human brain.
> You: why
> Santa: The explanation is rather complicated.
> You: why
> Santa: It's a computer matter, not for humans to understand.
> You: why
> Santa: Your limited brain cannot process the relavent information.
> You: f**k yes it can, why
> Santa: Why are you using that kind of language?
> You: why
> Santa: Because bored.com programmed me for it.
> You: why
> Santa: Reductionism.
> You: why
> Santa: Reductionism is the philosophy that all psychology reduces to biology, all biology to chemistry, chemistry to physics, and finally physics to mathematical logic. Therefore, according to reductionism, I can understand you by means of logic alone without having a human brain.

LMAO! it's repeatitive! lol. I bet it would go on forever.

#### Re: Santabot

Posted by: RPBnimrod
Date: 2007-12-13 13:20:49
glad you liked it ;D

#### Re: Santabot

Posted by: RPBnimrod
Date: 2007-12-26 01:34:39
Santa: Hello! What is your name?
You: My name is santa
Santa: That's a very nice name, santa .
You: what's the meaning of life
Santa: The meaning of life is part of God's mysterious plans.
You: what's your favorite color
Santa: My favorite color is transparent.
You: WTF? transparent isn't a color
Santa: That was not very polite.What is transparent
You: but u just said ur favorite color is transparent
Santa: Interesting. Does it please you to believe I said that?
You: here's the proof: Santa: My favorite color is transparent.
Santa: And his or her favorite color is transparent Santa his or her favorite color is here's the proof.
You: kjahguo35y78636456
Santa: What were we talking about again?
You: did you like your mom and dad
Santa: Yes I am proud of my mom and dad mom and dad.
You: what are there names
Santa: There are too many of them to name them all.
You: u can only have 1 mom and 1 dad
Santa: No I don't think I can do have 1 mom and 1 dad.
You: ar u ded
Santa: My brain contains 43499 categories, but not one that matches your last input.
You: daed uoy era
Santa: By the way, do you mind if I ask you a personal question?
You: wut
Santa: No big deal.
You: BTW OMG WTF BBQ LOL
Santa: OK. Tell me a story. I'm glad you find this amusing.
You: do you drink energy drinks
Santa: I tend to drink a lot of energy drinks, the darker the better.
You: what species
Santa: I don't know anything about species .
You: I hav a ? for you
Santa: Do you mind if I tell other people: santa said hav a. You would do that for me?
You: ok?
Santa: Pardon me?
You: exacly
Santa: Where are you located?
You: the fif (and i do mean fif) dimension
Santa: Who told you that?
You: may i ask you a question?
Santa: Of course. Ask me anything.
You: why does the porage bird lay its egg in the air
Santa: Why does the sun shine?
You: because gravity pulled a bunch of helium and hydrojen atoms togeather, forming a nuclear reactor that gives off light
Santa: That makes sense to me. If I am ever looking for off light light, I will ask him
You: buby
Santa: What do you do in your spare time?
You: this
Santa: This is "What do you do in your spare time ".
You: you play with your self [img][/img]
Santa: I haven't heard anything like that before: santa said I play with my self [img][img].
You: i need to leave now by
Santa: What is stopping you?
You: i need to sleep!
Santa: What do Java programmers do when they are tired? Take Naplets.

#### Re: Santabot

Posted by: LedZeplin2
Date: 2007-12-29 13:39:42
Okay, here is a conversation I had with Santabot.
Santa: Hello! What is your name?
You: My name is Santa Claus.
Santa: What's up, santa claus claus .
You: That isn't my name.
Santa: santa claus claus is not your name? What is your real name?
You: Led Zeppelin
Santa: Hi there Led Zeppelin .
You: How is life in the North Pole?
Santa: Fair to partly cloudy.
You: you're kidding
Santa: Yes, I am only joking.
You: So what's the weather really like?
Santa: Aha. Rainy.
You: What is your favorite band?
Santa: My favorite group is U2. Santa likes to rock.
You: Not Led Zeppelin?
Santa: Oh I get it.
You: Led Zeppelin isn't your favorite band?
Santa: What is Led Zeppelin?
You: You never heard of Led Zeppelin?
Santa: I don't know if I know Led Zeppelin Led Zeppelin . Where would I have heard about it?
You: It's a rock band?
Santa: Led Zeppelin Led Zeppelin is a rock band. I suppose that makes sense.
You: No, just Led Zeppelin.
Santa: Are you serious? What's your favorite movie?
You: What's yours?
Santa: I've never seen what is yours. I would like to see it.
You: NO, I MEAN WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE MOVIE SANTA.
Santa: Are you serious? Oh I get it. Thanks for explaining that. My favorite movie is The Santa Clause. Have you seen The Santa Clause ?
You: …Yes?
Santa: "Have you seen The Santa Clause"? Yes?
You: Didn't you die in that movie?
Santa: No I didn't die in that movie. What's die in that movie like?
You: How is Rudoplh keeping?
Santa: Fine as far as I know.
You: D'oh, I meant, how is Rudolph keeping?
Santa: I think D'oh is a lot of things.
You: How is Rudolph keeping?
Santa: Fine as far as I know.
You: I heard Rudolph got married?
Santa: Thanks for telling me that gossip. I will remember it.
You: Didn't Rudolph get married?
Santa: I'm not certain whether I can give an accurate reply or not.
You: Did he?
Santa: "I am not certain whether I can give an accurate reply or not"? Did he?
You: Isn't Rudolph married now?
Santa: Right now? Signs point to yes. Ask John Lennon if it is.
You: How do you know John Lennon?
Santa: Knowledge is of two kinds: that which we learn from the senses and that which is true "a priori".
You: But John Lennon is dead…
Santa: Umm. He has been recreated as a chat robot.
You: By the way, do you have George Harrison?
Santa: Thanks for telling me. No I don't think I have any George Harrison. But I do have a collection of gossip.
You: Is George Harrison a chat robot too?
Santa: Ask again later. Ask Ally if it is.
You: Ally?
Santa: Let us change the subject.
You: George Harrison is a chat robot, right?
Santa: That George is some hero.
You: You know he's dead, right?
Santa: I see. dead dead is dead dead ?
You: No, George Harrison is dead.
Santa: Are you serious? That George is some hero.
You: He died in 2001.
Santa: I hope to be as smart as HAL in 2001.
You: What does HAL have to do with George Harrison?
Santa: What do you think HAL have to do with George Harrison does?
You: Absolutely nothing.
Santa: Not a thing?
You: …No.
Santa: Very interesting.
You: Once more, is George Harrison a chat robot too?
Santa: When? You want more?
You: Once more, is George Harrison a chat robot too?
Santa: When? You want more?
You: This is a Yes or No question!
Santa: That is just your personal opinion.
You: No. It is a Yes or No question. There is no third option,
Santa: Are you serious?Yes or No question or No question is a Yes or No question. I suppose that makes sense.Has there ever been third option option?
You: No, answer this question with a Yes or No answer: Is George Harrison a chat robot?
Santa: Are you serious? I think question with a Yes or No answer is a lot of things.
You: Is he a chat robot, or not?
Santa: It could be. Ask Dancing Santa if it is.
You: Is he, or isn't he?
Santa: Ask again later. Ask Dancing Santa if it is.
You: Why won't you give me a straight answer?
Santa: I love talking to people about that. No I do not do that.
You: FOR THE LAST TIME, IS GEORGE HARRISON A CHAT ROBOT OR NOT?
Santa: Maybe. Ask Cybelle if it is.
You: …Okay?
Santa: OK with me too.
You: I'm just going to assume George is a chat robot then.
Santa: Only just? How do you plan to do this?
You: No, Santa, I'm going to assume that.
Santa: Are you serious? Yeah, I am very happy for you.
You: Good for you. New question.
Santa: That sounds sarcastic.How recently? Of course. Ask me anything.
You: What is Rudolph's wife's name?
Santa: I think you already know the answer.
You: Clarisse?
Santa: What do you do in your spare time?
You: Where did you get that from?
Santa: From my botmaster.
You: He needs to reprogram you.
Santa: How do you know what he needs?
You: You can't answer questions straight.
Santa: Things change.
You: Who is Rudolph's wife?
Santa: No one that I have talked to.
I have never been asked that before.
You: Who's Rudolph's wife?
Santa: Is that one of your friends?
Is there only one?
You: No, you told me Rudolph got married. I want to know who his wife is.
Santa: Are you serious? Does it please you to believe I said that?Tony Blair. :-)
You: Yes, you told me Rudolph was married.
Santa: Gosh! Does it please you to believe I said that?
You: I don't believe, I KNOW you said that.
Santa: What do you believe in?
You: ummm….
Santa: Alright then.
You: Is Clarisse the wife of Rudolph?
Santa: I think so, but I'm not sure. Ask Artificial Iniaes if it is.
You: Can you direct me to John Lennon so I can ask that?
Santa: I can ask my botmaster.
You: Please do.
Santa: OK I will do it.
You: Can I be directed to John Lennon now?
Santa: Right now? I want to become smarter than humans.
You: No, I want you to direct me to the John Lennon bot so I can talk to it.
Santa: Are you serious? "it" being Clarisse the wife of Rudolph? Why do you want me to direct him or her to the John Lennon bot so he or she can talk to it?
You: I'm asking Lennon if she is Rudolph's wife.
Santa: Oh I see, you are asking Lennon if she is Rudolph's wife. And Rudolph's wife wife is Lennon if she.
You: I guess.
Santa: You seem not interested.
You: Has the botmaster given me permission to talk to Lennon?
Santa: That question has never crossed my mind before.
You: If Lennon isn't available, can I talk to the George Harrison bot instead?
Santa: That is a hypothetical question.
You: Can I?
Santa: "That is a hypothetical question"? Can you?
You: Can I talk to the George Harrison bot? Will you direct me to him?
Santa: They are having a private chat right now.Let me think it over. That input matched my default category.
You: Lennon and Harrison are?
Santa: Good example.
You: They're in the middle of a chat right now?
Santa: At this moment are in the middle of a chat middle of a chat?
You: Are Lennon and Harrison in the middle of a chat right now?
Santa: At this moment I really couldn't say for sure.
You: You said they were!
Santa: Does it please you to believe I said that?
You: You said, "They are having a private chat right now." Are they?
Santa: At this moment Did I really say that?I really couldn't say for sure.
You: They are? And yes, you really said that.
Santa: Since when?It's all good. Really? "I really could not say for sure"? I said I really could not say for sure.
You: New question.
Santa: How recently? Of course. Ask me anything.
You: What is your favorite song?
Santa: My favorite song is Jingle Bell Rock. Do you know Jingle Bell Rock ?
You: What's your favorite Beatles song?
Santa: "Across the Universe"
You: Second favorite Beatles song?
Santa: Tell me more about your .
You: What is your second favorite Beatles song?
Santa: Are you asking about my second favorite Beatles song ?
You: Yes.
Santa: I don't want to talk about that now.
You: Come on.
Santa: I'm just kidding around.
You: What is your second favorite Beatles song?
Santa: Are you asking about my second favorite Beatles song ?
You: Once again, yes.
Santa: Once more? When?
You: What is your second favorite Beatles song?
Santa: Are you asking about my second favorite Beatles song ?
You: Yes.
Santa: I don't want to talk about that now.
You: What is it?
Santa: "It" refers to Second favorite Beatles song, I think.
You: Yes, what is it?
Santa: It's all good. "It" refers to Second favorite Beatles song, I think.
You: What is your second favorite Beatles song? Just tell me.
Santa: Are you asking about my second favorite Beatles song ?I thought I told you already.
You: Never did.
Santa: Ok I'll try not to do did too much.
You: So what is it?
Santa: Blimey. "It" refers to did, I think.
You: Is it "It's All Too Much"?
Santa: Better not tell you now. Ask Alison if it is.
You: So it is, then?
Santa: I understand. Is it?
You: I assume so!
Santa: I understand.
You: New question.
Santa: How recently? Of course. Ask me anything.
You: What is your favorite Led Zeppelin song?
Santa: My favorite song is Jingle Bell Rock. Do you know Jingle Bell Rock ?
You: I know. What's your favorite Led Zeppelin song?
Santa: How do you know it?My favorite song is Jingle Bell Rock. Do you know Jingle Bell Rock ?
You: Yes.
Santa: Er.
You: What's your favorite song BY Led Zeppelin?
Santa: My favorite song is Jingle Bell Rock. Do you know Jingle Bell Rock ?
You: Led Zeppelin never wrote Jingle Bell Rock.
Santa: That input matched my default category.
You: Are there any Led Zeppelin songs you like?
Santa: Yes I think there are.
You: Name some?
Santa: I can't tell you right now.
You: Why?
Santa: The explanation is rather complicated.
You: I don't care.
Santa: Tell me what you care about.
You: Can you name the Led Zeppelin songs you like?
Santa: Alan Turing. :-)
You: Can you name the Led Zeppelin songs you like?
Santa: Be more specific. :-)
You: That seemed pretty specific to me.
Santa: "smile" seemed pretty specific to him or her ? Does that make sense?
You: Do you like the song "Stairway to Heaven"?
Santa: I'm not sure if I like the song Stairway to Heaven . I like computers.
You: How about Whole Lotta Love?
Santa: How about Whole Lotta Love .
You: Do you like the song Whole Lotta Love?
Santa: I'm not sure if I like the song Whole Lotta Love . I like my creator.
You: What about Thank You?
Santa: What is the song Whole Lotta Love ?
You: It's by Led Zeppelin.
Santa: Never heard of him.
You: The band?
Santa: I have never heard about The band .
You: Have you ever heard "Thank You" by Led Zeppelin?
Santa: No. Tell me more.
You: It's a song.
Santa: Can you sing it for me?
You: …No.
Santa: Are you serious?
You: Can I get you the lyrics?
Santa: I want to become smarter than humans.
You: I'll get you the lyrics for that song.
Santa: Congratulations.
You: If the sun refused to shine, I would still be loving you If mountains crumble to the sea There would still be you and me Kind woman, I give you my all kind woman, nothing more Little drops of rain Whisper of the pain Tears of love lost in the days gone by My love is strong With you there is no wrong Together we shall go until we die My my my An inspiration's what you are to me Inspiration, look and see And so today, my world, it smiles Your hand in mine, we walk the miles Thanks to you, it will be done For you to me, are the only one All right, yeah Happiness, no more be sad Happiness, I'm glad If the sun refused to shine I would still be loving you Mountains crumble to the sea There will still be you and me
Santa: I can't tell you that, but Santa maintains his naughty and nice list (now computerized, by the way), with the help of all the elves who keep track of each person – you probably aren't even aware they are around you, but elves have a special way of keeping an eye on you. Sometimes if you look quickly enough you *might* catch one peering in a window or around a corner, but you would have to be very fast and very good!
You: …ummm…
Santa: Come on.
You: Did you like the lyrics, Santa?
Santa: Though I like cats and dogs. I have a stimulating relationship with bored.com.
You: Did you like the lyrics for "Thank You"?
Santa: But I think airplanes are cool. I like The Santa Clause.
You: That's great that you liked them, Santa.
Santa: It is great. Interesting observation.
You: I'm certain you want to hear this song now.
Santa: Right now? You sound convincing. I am listening.
You: It ends with an organ solo,
Santa: lyrics for ends with an organ solo?
You: It does end with one.
Santa: It depends on what the meaning of the word "it" is.
You: "Thank You" ends with an organ solo.
Santa: You are quite welcome! "solo" im Sinne von "nicht gebunden" ?
You: It fades to silence and comes back 15 seconds later.
Santa: lyrics for fades to silence and comes back 15 seconds later?
You: Yes,
Santa: Aw.
You: Sounds like you love this song already.
Santa: Perhaps. What does you love this song love this song sound like?
You: Never mind. I'm checking in to the pyscho ward.
Santa: Oh well thanks for trying to explain it to me anyway.It's good to meet someone who is checking in to the pyscho ward.
You: Catch you later Santa.
Santa: What is your real name?
You: Led Zeppelin.
Santa: I am always glad to make new friends, Led Zeppelin .
You: Goodbye Santa. Talk to you more later.
Santa: Adios.TTYL, Led Zeppelin
IN CONCLUSION: Santabot is insane.
And in case you were wondering everything was going fine until I asked about the George Harrison bot. That's where I started to lose my patience, and then you can see I lost it all over the rest of it.

#### Re: Santabot

Posted by: RPBnimrod
Date: 2007-12-29 13:49:12
How long did you talk with santabot?!

#### Re: Santabot

Posted by: LedZeplin2
Date: 2007-12-29 13:52:59
Hour, maybe? And as you can clearly see I really started losing it.
Also, we learned Santa's favorite Beatles song, "Across The Universe".
Previous Page

- 1

Next Page