Tower of Cash
Posted by: Ketsuban
Date: 2009-10-09 17:08:44
Now, here are the rules.
42 amounts are distributed among two sides of 21 floors. Pick a floor and a side. You can only collect one of the two amounts, so hope for the good one.
Now, half of the spaces are so full of cash…
<AUDIENCE>: HOW MUCH CASH IS IT?
…that the biggest one is, for this game…
[ OPENS ENVELOPE ]
It's
[ Heavy applause ]
http://www.qwizx.com/gssfx/usa/sc-openingdoors.wav
That means the remaining 20 cash amounts range from
http://www.qwizx.com/gssfx/usa/5th-lockin.wav
And there are 21 amounts on the right side, which we will describe in a minute.
http://www.qwizx.com/gssfx/usa/5th-lockin.wav
[IMG]http://i37.tinypic.com/15g5vz8.png[/img]
RANDOM.ORG's chief random monkey has kindly selected the locations of these amounts…now what are those amounts?
<GLaDOS:> Right in front are the eight Time Warps..
The red ones warp backwards…
http://www.qwizx.com/gssfx/usa/mole-executed.wav
[ BOOS ]
<GLaDOS:> …And the green ones warp forwards.
http://www.qwizx.com/gssfx/usa/smtm-right.wav
[ CHEERS ]
<GLaDOS:> Your score will go forwards or backwards by the percent indicated. So you could double, or you could lose everything.
DISCLAIMER: Please note that all warps round off to the nearest dollar. Sebben & Sebben Productions are not responsible for any lost money as a result of this policy. You know why? Because it might gain you some money.
<GLaDOS:> You know, we're nice enough to allow you a second chance at something. So we put the Anything on the board.
http://www.qwizx.com/gssfx/usa/lingo-timesupbonus.wav
<GLaDOS:> It simply duplicates any one of the other 41 values and acts accordingly.
Of course, if used improperly, it can be evil. Because I said ANY of the other 41 values. Not just the good ones.
<GLaDOS:> For the people who like to add a little Russian Roulette into their time warps…
There is the Math Time.
http://www.qwizx.com/gssfx/usa/tpir-sdding.wav
<GLaDOS:> This will multiply your score by a random number between 0 and 3, inclusive, rounded to the tenth.
<GLaDOS:> You have to be a bit careful when you take this one…
The Bump!
http://www.qwizx.com/gssfx/usa/hr-double.wav
<GLaDOS:> BUMP will replace a weighted, but randomly selected, digit in your score with a randomly selected digit.
The higher the money is, the greater the weight, and in the most vulnerable areas.
It could do nothing…
It might be devastating…
It could be amazing…
Or anything in between.
<GLaDOS:> Hate having all zeros at the end of your score?
Want to dress up your score cosmetically?
Then buy our Random 4, 5, and 6!
http://www.qwizx.com/gssfx/usa/1v100-moblocked.wav
<GLaDOS:> They generate completely random numbers with 4, 5, or 6 digits, depending on the selection.
http://www.qwizx.com/gssfx/usa/is-winner.wav
<GLaDOS:> That's an alert…
The Prefix and Suffix are very important.
They add a randomly selected digit to the front or the back of your score. Zeros are allowed, which means the Prefix can occasionally do an ACME. :P
<GLaDOS:> It's red, it's worth nothing, but it doesn't blow up!
The Red Cent!
http://www.qwizx.com/gssfx/usa/1v100-nowrong.wav
<GLaDOS:> They are worthless, so YOU GET… NOTHING!
YOU LOSE!
GOOD DAY, SIR! :lol:
It should be a Red Penny, but it's too late to change that. :)
<GLaDOS:> And finally…if you like being bombarded with zakusky from across the Bering Strait, this is for you.
It is….
the OMEGA!!
http://www.qwizx.com/gssfx/usa/smtm-kqwrong.wav
[ GROANS, BOOING ]
<GLaDOS:> The game will instantly end, and you go down to the dank Basement.
You then have a coin-flip decision to walk out with either the money you have, or just a free chiropractor appointment. :evil:
But you know, we hope the random monkey is being nice enough to avoid that.
And there are the Tower rules. Are you ready to play the game?